The Art Of Charm | High Performance Techniques| Cognitive Development | Relationship Advice | Mastery Of Human Dynamics

Time for Fan Mail Friday, where we'll be answering your questions and dropping some knowledge and feedback to help you kick the weekend off right. In this episode: Does resolving simulations in your head keep you up in the middle of the night? Now that you're doing well for yourself, is it petty to be reluctant about helping an ex who treated you poorly when you weren't? After moving to a new town, where can you meet people during the day if you want to cut back on the excesses of nightlife? How do you break the habit of checking social media every day? Why do Americans smile so much? How do you get colleagues to treat you as an equal when you look much younger than your years? How do top performers like Adam Braun build resources and change the world all at once? Sometimes helping your competition is what keeps you in first place. Quick shoutouts to Matthew Fox, who's biking across the USA, and Mjölnir-hurling Thor himself, Chris Hemsworth! Have any questions, comments, or stories you'd like to share with u

Adam Braun (@AdamBraun) is the founder of school-building Pencils of Promise and bestselling author of The Promise of a Pencil. He joins us to discuss his new project, MissionU, and how it aims to update higher education for the 21st century. "Credential isn't nearly as important as competency." -Adam Braun The Cheat Sheet: How and why is the education system in the US failing students? Why students are even less prepared for careers now than ever before. How MissionU protects its students from the crushing debt typically incurred by most college graduates. New methods and tracks of study that are more "futureproof" than others. How to think like an executive even if -- and especially -- it's your first year on the job. And so much more... Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Want to wash two loads and dry two loads of laundry at the same time? The new Wi-Fi enabled Samsung FlexWash and FlexDry washer

Chris Hadfield (@Cmdr_Hadfield) is an engineer, former Royal Canadian Air Force fighter pilot, retired astronaut, the first Canadian to walk in space, and author of An Astronaut's Guide to Life on Earth and The Darkest Dark. "The big decisions are the easy ones." -Commander Chris Hadfield The Cheat Sheet: The difference between "I want to be" and "I want to turn myself into." Enjoying small victories along a path of preparation and personal growth vs. grand "make it or break it" expectations. How intense is imposter syndrome for a newly selected astronaut? What's the astronaut's (as well as earthling's) best antidote for fear? What really happens when you sneeze in space? And so much more... Are you trying to hire the right person for your business, but the best candidates keep slipping away? Let ZipRecruiter -- the fastest way to hire great people -- help you screen only the best here! Want to wash two loads and dry two loads of laundry at the same time? The new Wi-Fi enabled Samsung FlexWash and FlexDry w

Welcome to Minisode Monday, where we kick off the week with something quick and actionable -- to make you more magnetic and effective -- that you can implement right away. This time around, we show how making a small change in how we treat people we meet promotes a mindset shift in the way we're perceived and the way we perceive ourselves. Let's get to it! The Cheat Sheet: Take the extra effort to treat everyone you meet as if you're going to know each other forever. Think about it: if you're in a lousy mood, you might be more dismissive about someone you think you'll never see again. But the world's smaller than you think -- act as if you might cross paths again with the people you meet, because it's always a possibility.  This doesn't mean you have to approach everyone as if they're going to be your new best friend, but being mindful of the fact you may meet again will make you more conscious of how you act toward them. As we demonstrate here, just the simple act of being nice to people can make a big diff

Time for Fan Mail Friday, where we'll be answering your questions and dropping some knowledge and feedback to help you kick the weekend off right. Let's cut to it! In this episode: How do you overcome the need for external validation in a good relationship that's suffering from the fallout of past bad relationships? What's the best way to prepare for the death of a terminally ill loved one when you've still got a little time to spend with them and basic 21st century technology? A ten-year podcast listener and AoC Bootcamp alumnus weighs in on life changes three years since attending. Is it more cringeworthy to admit when we don't know something, or to pause a conversation mid-flow to go look it up on Google? Make America smarter? What dat mean? Wondering how to leave a voice message that will actually get you a response? Here's an example. Is it reasonable to expect an honest answer from your ex about where your relationship went wrong? It really depends on why you're asking. Shoutouts to Theresa Kwayi and C

Nick Bilton (@nickbilton) is a special correspondent for Vanity Fair, a contributor to CNBC, a former columnist and reporter for The New York Times, and author of Hatching Twitter: A True Story of Money, Power, Friendship, and Betrayal and American Kingpin: The Epic Hunt for the Criminal Mastermind Behind the Silk Road. "I don't believe we have crossed the line. I think we've just moved it." -Ross Ulbricht The Cheat Sheet: How does a merit badge-bedecked Eagle Scout become the head of a thriving online black market worth a billion dollars? What are the costs of maintaining a double life? What's the real reason Silk Road mastermind Ross Ulbricht was caught? What is Nick Bilton's unique research process for covering a story like this? Is everyone susceptible to the level of Ross Ulbricht's mix of ambition, hubris, and self-deception, or does it require a certain personality type? And so much more... SmartMouth is the only activated oral rinse clinically proven to eliminate existing bad breath and prevent it f

Dean Karnazes (@DeanKarnazes) may be most famous for running fifty marathons in fifty states in fifty days, but he's also a bestselling author who most recently published The Road to Sparta: Reliving the Ancient Battle and Epic Run That Inspired the World's Greatest Footrace. "We're so comfortable, we're miserable." -Dean Karnazes The Cheat Sheet: What drives someone to leave their secure corporate job and run a hundred thousand miles (so far) in a lifetime -- including three hundred and fifty nonstop miles through the desert? Why does Dean Karnazes believe comfort is overrated? How do modern marathons differ from the first one run by Pheidippides over two thousand years ago? Explore what happens to your body when you push it past limits you once considered insurmountable. Discover how to unlock your own inner strength to achieve extraordinary results. And so much more... Want to wash two loads and dry two loads of laundry at the same time? The new Wi-Fi enabled Samsung FlexWash and FlexDry washer and dryer

Welcome to Minisode Monday, where we kick off the week with something quick and actionable -- to make you more magnetic and effective -- that you can implement right away. This week, we talk about success momentum: small wins that increase confidence and resilience. Let's get to it! The Cheat Sheet: Sometimes we jump out of bed, ready to attack the day. But what do we do on days we wake up without motivation? Some people have morning rituals. But starting with even just one small win can be as simple as brushing your teeth or walking the dog. Small wins generate success momentum that builds up over time and results in bigger wins -- and a better self-image. Remember Aesop's tortoise and the hare fable? It's not the quickest, but the most consistent who usually prevails. To learn more about social dynamics and productivity hacks, take the Art of Charm Challenge by clicking here, or text CHARMED to 33444. Also be sure to check out our Social Capital Intensive here! Let us know about how you put today's Minisod

Time for Fan Mail Friday, where we'll be answering your questions and dropping some knowledge and feedback to help you kick the weekend off right. Even a life you love isn't going to be free of things you don't like. Does the quest for self-awareness have diminishing returns? Some encouraging words from a listener who gets more out of AoC than a library's worth of self-help books. Are microexpressions universal, or aren't they? Dr. Lisa Feldman Barrett weighs in on Dr. Paul Ekman's research and the evolving nature of scientific knowledge. This also applies to Amy Cuddy's work. Even if an airline representative is being a jerk to one of your fellow passengers, is the aisle of an airplane ever a reasonable place to protest? Would you take a flight for a vacation but use distance as an excuse to keep you from training to further your career? Quick shoutouts to General Stanley McChrystal for hitting the bestseller list again and Kelly, who understands the importance of being thorough with makeup application! Hav

David Eagleman (@davideagleman) is a Stanford neuroscientist, host of Emmy-nominated PBS/BBC series The Brain, and author of Incognito: The Secret Lives of the Brain and The Brain: The Story of You. The Cheat Sheet: Why our conscious brain should be grateful for its separation from the subconscious brain. What is sensory substitution, and how might it allow the blind to "see," the deaf to "hear," and create completely new, superhuman senses altogether? Your umwelt is not my umwelt: a shared environment is several realities, depending on how it's being sensed. Alien hands, intellectual flexibility, zombie routines, and smartphone symbiosis. How might technology augment our brains in the not-too-distant future? And so much more... Want to wash two loads and dry two loads of laundry at the same time? The new Wi-Fi enabled Samsung FlexWash and FlexDry washer and dryer pair can do it -- and you can get it now at The Home Depot! Whether you're a lady or a gent, you don't need to know what MicroModal fabric is to

Bryan Callen (@bryancallen) is an actor, comedian, and podcaster who grew up traveling the world. He holds a blue belt in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, is certain of comedy's power to change the world, and is older than you probably think he is. "Embrace the chaos." -Bryan Callen The Cheat Sheet: Why you should welcome the advice of an expert who tells you you're doing it all wrong -- no matter what "it" happens to be. How growing up all over the world and feeling like an outsider makes perpetual reinvention a natural way to face and conquer challenges. Dealing with rejection on a personal and professional level. You may never be the best at something you enjoy; don't let it deter you from striving to be better. How creating the architecture for a full life defuses otherwise devastating setbacks. And so much more... Learn over 500 subjects -- including The Great Ideas of Philosophy by Daniel N. Robinson (recommended by Bryan Callen in this episode) at The Great Courses Plus -- The Art of Charm listeners get one mont

Welcome to Minisode Monday, where we kick off the week with something quick and actionable -- to make you more magnetic and effective -- that you can implement right away. "You think you're ordering a coffee, but you're also sending non-verbal signals out the entire time. What do those signals communicate?" -Jordan Harbinger In this Minisode Monday, we talk about the messages we're sending and receiving between the lines when we communicate both verbally and non-verbally -- and how we can hone the way we send and receive for greater clarity. Let's get to it! The Cheat Sheet for Communication Between the Lines: Intentionally expressed or not, there's always something going on between the lines when it comes to communication -- whether it's verbal or non-verbal. This between-the-lines message may not only be unintentional -- its interpretation may be faulty on the receiving end because non-verbal communication isn't necessarily universal. How can we get a grip on the signals we send -- and ensure we're not mis

Time for Fan Mail Friday, where we'll be answering your questions and dropping some knowledge and feedback to help you kick the weekend off right. Once again, our beloved Gabriel Mizrahi rejoins us for this one. Let's cut to it! In this episode: Is it possible to have an honest, productive conversation with someone who thinks they're always right -- in spite of being your boss and constantly losing clients for your company? When the job you spent six years in school pursuing isn't hiring and you're considering other paths, might we remind you of skill stacking? [Related: Minisode Monday #50 | Skill Stacking for Top Performance and The Secret to Success? Be a Contradiction] How do you hunt for a job in a desired location that's thousands of miles away while ensuring prospective employers take your intention to relocate seriously? [Related: AoC Toolbox episodes and The 30-Day Social Capital Challenge] What is the difference between skill salad and skill stacking? While the science is still out, do you really n

Are you resilient? Resilience -- true grit -- has to last in order to be real. That's what we're going to explore in this toolbox: how to build real and lasting grit. [Photo by Lewis Wickes Hine] The Cheat Sheet: The jolt of purpose sometimes masquerades as its more complicated and permanent cousin, grit. Is there a formula for grit? How does adversity affect grit? Grit isn't a technical skill or a fixed framework -- it's a process. To what end is grit about us and the way we think vs. what life hands over to us? And so much more... Want to wash two loads and dry two loads of laundry at the same time? The new Wi-Fi enabled Samsung FlexWash and FlexDry washer and dryer pair can do it -- and you can get it now at The Home Depot! Are you trying to hire the right person for your business, but the best candidates keep slipping away? Let ZipRecruiter -- the fastest way to hire great people -- help you screen only the best here! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhostin

Gabrielle Reece (@GabbyReece) has been a volleyball player, a model, an actress, a television personality, a mom, a community servant, author of My Foot Is Too Big for the Glass Slipper: A Guide to the Less Than Perfect Life, and now a podcaster on The Truth Barrel with Gabrielle Reece and Neil Strauss. "Do you want to cry that you have low cards, or do you want to play your high cards and get on with it?" -Gabrielle Reece The Cheat Sheet: How is becoming a mother like "flipping a switch?" Gabrielle is tough. But did you know she's cooking chili for Owen Wilson while in the early stages of labor tough? After two decades of (not always perfect) marriage to big wave surfer Laird Hamilton, what advice does Gabrielle have for people with big personalities in relationships with other big personalities? Understand what Gabrielle means when she says there's "great strength in yielding." What does Gabrielle consider her most selfish indulgence? And so much more... Hate grocery shopping but you love to cook? Blue Ap

Ever get upset by rude comments on the Internet? In this Minisode Monday, we share an effective strategy for dealing with this that we learned from Jay Baer, author of Hug Your Haters: How to Embrace Complaints and Keep Your Customers. Let's get to it! The Cheat Sheet: You can post anything online -- videos of puppies eating birthday cake -- and someone will eventually show up to leave a hateful or hurtful comment. If you're immune to the impact of anonymous rudeness on the Internet, you're better than most of us. But if you're not, Jay Baer recommends a simple strategy: treat your haters like toddlers. Think about it: if you're enjoying yourself at a dinner party and your host's three-year-old wanders into the room and makes fun of your pants, you probably won't care. We don't tend to give toddlers much credit for having an informed opinion about anything, nor do we rely on their sense of taste. So would we get upset at a toddler and try to "set them straight" in such a situation? Next time someone brings y

Time for Fan Mail Friday, where we'll be answering your questions and dropping some knowledge and feedback to help you kick the weekend off right. As a bonus, screenwriter and BFF Gabriel Mizrahi joins us for this one. Let's cut to it! Where's the line between a stretch and a lie if you're following the "fake it 'til you make it" strategy? [Related: Jesse Itzler | The 100 Mile Man (Episode 466)] If you feel aimless and don't like college or the job you're working now, have you considered learning a trade? [Related: Mike Rowe | The Way I Heard It (Episode 597)] How do you make friends with people in your own age group when you mentally feel a decade more mature than all of them? [Related: Dual Enrollment Programs: The Pros and Cons] Are you blaming your significant other for your own failures, or is their lack of ambition pulling you down? How should you deal with lazy or non-contributing team members who make your job harder -- especially when the boss seems to actively avoid conflict? How can you thrive in

Peter McGraw (@petermcgraw) is an associate professor of marketing and psychology at the University of Colorado Boulder, founder of the Humor Research Lab (HuRL), and co-author of The Humor Code: A Global Search for What Makes Things Funny. The Cheat Sheet: Humor is ubiquitous -- amusement and laughter are present in all cultures and many non-human mammals. Humor: what is it good for? What are the risks and rewards of humor? Is there a connection between laughter and memory? Can humor be taught? And so much more... If you're a business owner, did you know your payments solution can be an engine for growth? Rethink payments with Braintree. Find out more at braintreepayments.com/forbes! Want to wash two loads and dry two loads of laundry at the same time? The new Wi-Fi enabled Samsung FlexWash and FlexDry washer and dryer pair can do it -- and you can get it now at The Home Depot! Save money on travel and get a free Amazon gift card every time you use Upside! Enter the code FORBES at checkout here and you're

Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) is the Frederick P. Rose Director of the Hayden Planetarium and author of number one New York Times Bestseller Astrophysics for People in a Hurry. "As the area of your knowledge grows, so too does the perimeter of your ignorance." -Neil deGrasse Tyson The Cheat Sheet: How does a seasoned scientist maintain childlike curiosity? Understand the power of science to transcend bias. Find out why Neil didn't have typical public speaking jitters when he gave his first lecture at age fifteen. Do you have to be a math wizard to pursue science? What enlightened leadership (from either side of the aisle) understands about the value of science -- and why science denial has surged so dramatically in recent years. And so much more... Want to wash two loads and dry two loads of laundry at the same time? The new Wi-Fi enabled Samsung FlexWash and FlexDry washer and dryer pair can do it -- and you can get it now at The Home Depot! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopp

Welcome to Minisode Monday, where we kick off the week with something quick and actionable -- to make you more magnetic and effective -- that you can implement right away. This week, Reach author Andy Molinsky rejoins us to talk about the creative ways we manage avoidance of things we don't want to do -- and what we can do to break the habit. Let's get to it! The Cheat Sheet: Avoid the task entirely. Structuring our lives around the tasks we want to avoid. Example: staying away from networking events, even if we know we could benefit from going to them. Doing the task, but only part way. Accomplishing the part of a task that's slightly more comfortable than the rest of it. Example: Going to a networking event, but making an excuse for leaving early. Replacing the task. Convincing ourselves that doing an easier task makes up for the task we don't want to do. Example: Being active in social media because we don't want to go to networking events. Procrastinating. Putting off tasks so we can avoid doing them unt