Worst Collection Ever

Green Lantern [vol 2] #173 (1984)This ep is about Green Lantern. Quick question though — does anyone know how the constructs actually work? Like, does Hal have to be RIGHT NEXT TO IT for it to exist or can he fly away, go get lunch and come back to find his construct still intact?Anyway, Green Lantern comes back from space exile and goes back to work at Ferris, saves a dude from getting impaled by a girder and tries out a psionic recliner. Later, he meets Javelin, a German Olympian with Cloud Car pilots for henchmen. Javelin manages to survive the wrath of bloodthirsty truckers to do battle with GL and discover his weakness for yellow nacho cheese (this was legit before Crisis).Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

Marvel Two-In-One #38 (1978)We are back from a brief holiday break with a predictably ridiculous look at MARVEL TWO-IN-ONE with The Thing and Daredevil.The Thing is in jail because he’s raging rock monster. Matt Murdock is awful at his lawyer duties in his defense of Ben so its up to Daredevil to get The Thing cleared. Daredevil then beats up Tom Atkins from HALLOWEEN III and accomplishes nothing. Thankfully, Ben just breaks out of prison because he’s super-strong and confronts the culprit, the Mad Thinker, in his sewer lair. Robot violence ensues and at the end of it all, Ben and Daredevil are pretty much going to die because they stink.Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

Batman: Legends Of The Dark Knight #79 (1996)We keep on with the holiday theme as we check out Batman on a quest to find some stolen goods from Wayne Manor. First, he stops off at a peep show to talk to a blind woman, followed by YEETING some thugs with the Batmobile. It all wraps up a chemical factory with Batman smacking around some dudes with bad haircuts. Its actually a good story - no lie.Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

Hawk & Dove [vol 3] #20 (1991)Its holiday adventure as Dove must save an extremely crowded (and panic-attack inducing) toy store from a Frosty with a flamethrower and a violent ballerina. Thankfully, there are ninja dinosaurs named after US Presidents nearby to lend a hand. Also, Hawk has some locker-room conversation!Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

Psychoblast #9 (1988)PSYCHOBLAST is about a dude who melds with some type of powerful entity that only comes out when he sleeps. NO…..it is NOT Sleepwalker! Psychoblast is recognizable via his Best Value Quicksilver costume and “Christopher Walken as Max Shreck” hairstyle. In the last issue of his own series, Psychoblast lies unconscious in a hospital bed like a jabroni while some armored dude annihilates New Order and plans to take over the world with his techno-organic tendrils.Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

The New Titans #0 (1994)This week, we go back to DC’s run of #0 issues, diving into what the New (Teen) Titans are up to. Nightwing shows up to tell people he’s leaving, Beast Boy is in the middle of his goth phase and their new villains — Coven and Slagg — make a great couples cosplay if you ever need one.Also, Shawn talks with author, podcaster and former guest Chris Mancini (COMEDY FILM NERDS) about his new graphic novel, RISE OF THE KUNG FU DRAGON MASTER which you can support on Kickstarter right here: http://kck.st/2WFhXH4 Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

Defenders #56 (1978)Jen is back and so are we when it comes to beating up on the Defenders so everyone can rejoice!In this issue, one of Valkyrie’s jobber friends tries to help her out against Lunatik, some alien dude who looks like Jared Leto’s Joker as played by Tekashi 6ix9ine (I had to look up that spelling because I’m old), only to get his skull caved in. Meanwhile in Russia, Bruce Banner desperately tries to not get aroused whilst draining radiation from his fellow Defenders. Also, Namor almost dies because they forget to give him some water.Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

The Flash #254 (1977)Its a very rare episode of WCE this week as Jen is NOT here but Shawn’s brother Brian (from the WhatTheHops podcast) takes her place to talk about a Flash book.In this book, Flash gets gaslighted as all hell by the Rogues via a gimmicked award statue while concurrently subjected to hallucinations from an obscure Silver Age villain. And if that wasn’t enough, Barry’s at home and witnesses Iris’s roommate friend conjuring up demons like its POLTERGEIST or something. Doesn’t matter — Crisis ruined everything.Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

Nightstalkers #12 (1993)Happy belated Halloween everyone!Nightstalkers was a Midnight Sons joint that featured Blade wearing sheet metal long johns and two other dudes - Hannibal King and Frank Drake - who are very similar. One might be a werewolf, the other might be a vampire. Here, the crew heads from Boston to Nebraska to deal with an EVENT HORIZON situation in a prison headed up by a Porter Wagoner-looking dude with electrical powers. Its like Wes Craven’s SHOCKER without the Alice Cooper/Kane Roberts cameos.Also, we have some audio issues in part of this ep due to cat chicanery so bear with us.Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

Generation X #22 (1996)As we approach Halloween, we check in with Generation X out in Vermont to see how they’re doing. As it turns out, Banshee’s eating a hot dog, Franklin Richards misses his parents and the locals are out there parading in Omega Red masks. Also, Emma Frost is being pestered by Nightmare because a scary lady demon chased him out of the Nightmare realm and he needs help to get back in. Meanwhile, the rest of the crew do battle with a bunch of Plastic Man-looking townies in a monster truck.Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

Sorry for the delay on this episode but we went to go see Tool this week and we’ve been fighting off those little clay monsters from their videos.We mix it up this week and review JOKER (2019), going SPOILERS AS ALL HELL! There was a lot to unpack in this film so it was worth taking the time to discuss. Also, we partook in a horror film festival this weekend and you’ll get to hear about it!Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

New Gods [vol 3] #19 (1990)Darkseid’s dad Yuga Khan is coming to visit so everything needs to be just perfect. The zombies need to bring his angry son Orion from Earth so that he can drain his power. And don’t forget to pay the plump necromancer — though you could probably stiff her. Most importantly, make sure the Grim Reaper on skis sucks the lifeforce out of a well-meaning Italian man. If all goes well, Metron might let you use his cosmic toilet. Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

New Warriors #28 (1992)Its the debut of a hip new 90s hero in this issue of NEW WARRIORS! Meet Turbo — the girl who has turbines on her wrists and looks like a Jetsons cast-off. At some point in his book, Turbo shoves her whole hand in a dude’s mouth.Also, Namorita’s got bad intel, leading to a battle with Russian importers/exporters and some winged jobber named Cardinal. I bet he’s from Arizona or something!Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

Haywire #3 (1988)This book almost ruined us.Haywire was an early DC “mature readers” offering (pre-Vertigo) about a scruffy dude whose parents get murdered and somehow, he ends up in a psionic suit of armor that looks like a rejected TMNT villain design. Like something Krang would come up with only to have it get dismantled in a single episode.In this particular issue, Haywire squares off against a BDSM-based villain called Nightlash who pretty much beats him like a jabroni. This book’s narrative and character distinction was very confusing; so much that it gave us both anxiety like when you know you can comprehend something but for some reason, you just CAN’T in that particular instance. It made us feel bad.Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

Thunderbolts #42 (2000)We’ve never really covered the Thunderbolts which is strange considering they’ve been around for 8000 years. But here’s a tale where they’re on the run, hiding out in the Rockies. Atlas ruins a woman’s bar, Wonder Man destroys a school and lady Citizen V fights Crimson Cowl with plumbing equipment. Its a chop suey of late-90s/early-00s comic book excess that I have no idea how we recovered from.Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

Detective Comics #519 (1982)Colonel Blimp — a zeppelin-based villain dressed like a purple M. Bison — incinerates D.C. while en route to extorting billions of dollars from the government via his battleship theft scheme. Batman sends Dick in red footie pajamas to the Arctic to retrieve the ship while Bats goes to the Garden State to punch a dude in the back of the neck. Somewhere in there, Elongated Man (played by Jeremy Renner) saves the nation’s capital (no he doesn’t)Also, we program a horror movie festival and explore the recent trend of vorarephilia.Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

Ms. Marvel #1 (1977)Neither of us had no idea that Carol Danvers once interviewed Diana Ross for ROLLING STONE and wrote a best-selling book on SPACE~! Huh….the things you learn from reading comics.So in the very first issue of her very first ongoing series, Carol Danvers aka Ms. Marvel attempts to stage dive after foiling a bank heist, becomes the editor of a women’s insert for the Daily Bugle and burns the Scorpion alive in boiling acid at a sprinkle museum pop-up in Brooklyn. Also, we discuss the demise of Jeremy Renner’s app and what it means for the dad rock genre. THESE ARE IMPORTANT THINGS!Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

ClanDestine #1 (1994)ClanDestine is one of the most jabroni forgotten teams that have ever been produced in comics. I’ve had a beef with this book for simply existing, dating all the way back to 1994.Anyway, a feudal villager made love with a genie and all their kids were immortal and had varied degrees of power gimmicks. Then THOSE peoples kids were born with powers and so on yet somehow, they all remained brother and sister. The current crop is made up of a constantly nude blue giant, a couple lame teenagers and a woman who becomes a cat after Edna Mode in a trucker hat severs her spine. This book had it coming.Also, we weigh in the new DisneyPlus/Marvel shows, the Joker trailer and Jeremy Renner’s Amazon store.Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

Machine Man [vol 2] #2 (1984)In one year from now — 2020 — we will have flying cars and sentient robots coming out of our ears as far as the Machine Man future is concerned. Also, Iron Man’s going to look really strange with his Jack-O-Lantern mouth. At least newsies caps will still be in style, much like they are now!Also, we comment on Spider-Man leaving the MCU as well as our recent trip to the Fort Collins Comic-Con.Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

Detention Comics #1 (1996)This is an anthology of school-related stories that were not good enough to make it into the 90s SHOWCASE books:Tim Drake beats up Suicidal Tendencies en route to stopping his method-out chum from killing a ponytailed fellow studentSuperboy makes a heartfelt statement about teacher’s salaries.Guy Gardner does a shot-for-shot remake of Morgan Freeman’s LEAN ON ME (1989)Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com