Plumbing The Death Star

In which our heroes don’t turn up to the studio, leave Duscher by himself, take a week off and lazily upload something from our past. We laugh, we cry, we avoid looking at Duscher directly in the face and wonder how we ever piece an episode together. Jackson just wants everyone to know where incest falls on the awful scale, Zammit patiently waits it out and Duscher just wants to get the intro right. It’s a supercut of every time Duscher fucks up introducing the show, but on the plus side it gets him to that right level of anger. So join the gang as we look back at our first season and come to the realisation that we aren’t very professional. Merry Christmas.To help us buy elocution lessons for Duscher head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month, you can make a difference in us getting the job done quicker. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In which our heroes come together for one last job, find friends in unfamiliar places and devise a master plan to save Christmas in Plumbing the Death Star Presents: A Christmas Heist. We discuss the dangers of having Catwoman on your side, the best place to keep a stolen Christmas and how afraid Arnie is of his Turboman suit. Jackson puts his faith in Frosty the Snowman, Zammit manages to make this somehow about comic books and Duscher just wants everyone to know how amazing Argyle is. So join the gang as they scheme, strategise and scam their way into the bank vaults, but ultimately, your hearts. It’s a yuletide, holiday heist which will almost definitely end with an inevitable betrayal. To help us buy fancy tech for this Christmas heist head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month, you can make a difference in us avoiding Christmas prison. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In which our heroes avoid getting petrified by the basilisk, dodge the whomping willow, trip on some moving stairs and wonder why Hogwarts hasn’t been shut down. In the thrilling conclusion of our seven part exploration of the Harry Potter Universe we look at the issues surrounding the tri-wizard tournament, the correct protocol when dealing with a murderous horse and try to outwit a boggart. Jackson wants to turn all his adversaries into cups, Zammit keeps getting Dumbledore confused with Voldemort and Duscher just wants to know why there’s a password to see the Headmaster. So join the gang as they lose 10 points by confronting the Great Evil but gain 100 for defeating said Great Evil. It’s nothing but mixed messages as every class is dismissed and every subject is passed on the whim of a crazy wizard.To help us bring Hogwarts up to code head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month, you can make a difference for a whole generation of young witches and wizards. Hosted on Acast

In which our heroes pass their O.W.L.S, get a solid D+ on their N.E.W.T.S and wonder just how poorly Hogwarts prepared them for the real wizarding world. We struggle to understand the patronus spell, question how any of the defence against the dark arts teachers got a job and can’t comprehend the timetable. Jackson dreams of being a football star, Zammit wants to know which of his teachers are werewolves and Duscher just wants everyone to understand Harry Potter is immortal. Join the gang as they try to find everyone a job, do some table math then kinda just give up on everything all together. It's an education that goes nowhere as we realise that no one is prepared for a single wizarding job.To help us find a real job head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month, you can make a difference in our wizarding lives. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In which our heroes fail to exhibit any magical tendencies, are barred from attending Hogwarts, and become janitors as we wonder where Squibs fit into the Harry Potter Universe. We discuss Filch's unfortunate situation, Wizard genetics, Wizard medical procedures and the double standard of Mudbloods and Squibs. Jackson wonders how many Hermiones there are, Zammit gets existential about paintings, and Duscher just assumes he'd be a Wizard no matter what. It's an unfortunate, scramble for a job suitable for a Squib as we avoid being Squid shamed and watch all the cool kids learn magic while we can’t even learn how to mix a potion or tame a dragon. Want to help us enrol in Wizarding Community College? Head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month, you can help make a difference in our magicless lives. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In which our heroes get on our Nimbus 2000s, let the golden snitch slip through our fingers and get hit by a bludger while while wondering who thought Quidditch was a good idea? We look at the proud sport of Boulderhead, the problem of height, and the danger inherent in using cleaning equipment as sporting equipment. Jackson accuses Madame Hooch of having a drinking problem, Zammit wants to introduce some basic necessary regulations, and Duscher just wishes he could do a Scottish accent. It's a brutal, airborne, game of champions, that can only end when someone grabs a snitch.Want to help us get the newest Firebolt? Head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month, you can help make a difference in our quidditch career. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In which our heroes lock themselves in chains, try to avoid the dementors, and serve out their sentence, whilst asking what are the ethical implications of Azkaban. In part three of our seven part exploration of the Harry Potter Universe we look at the best ways to capture wizards, the job possibilities of a dementor, and the frankly incompetent justice system in the magical world. Jackson tries to sort out the deer/rabbit equation, Zammit refuses to actually reference Harry Potter, and Duscher just wants all criminals to be permanently paralysed. It's a lawless, crime filled wizarding world, as we find ourselves adrift in a sea of criminal negligence.To help pay for our wizarding defence team head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month, you can make a difference to our continued freedom. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In which our heroes count up their galleons, bamboozle some muggles, bully Ron, and wonder why the Weaslys are so poor. In part two of our seven part exploration of the Harry Potter Universe we look at the bizarre nature of Wizard currency, discover we don't understand brains in the slightest, and explore the danger of floo-powder. Jackson thinks the Weaslys would enjoy Catholicism, Zammit doesn’t think the Weasly’s are poor at all, and Duscher just wonders why magic wont solve everything. It’s a wizarding spending spree as we spend every last knut, galleon, and the middle one on a fleet of nimbus 2014s and all the butter beer we can drink so we can rub it in Ron’s impoverished face .To help Ron afford new robes head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month, you can make a difference to his shitty poor wizard life. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In which our heroes arrive at Hogwarts, cross the Great Hall, get up in front of the teachers table and wonder where the Sorting Hat will put them. In part one of our seven part exploration of the Harry Potter Universe we look at the Sorting Hat’s frightening omnipotence, the dangerous nature of Hogwarts dinners, and the distribution of babes across all houses. Jackson gets vomited on instead of sorted, Zammit accepts Slytherin house far too readily, and Duscher just wishes everyone would accept his position as teaching staff. It's a Hogwarts divided against itself, all at the hands of an old, shitty hat.To help our wizarding dreams a reality head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month, you can make a difference to our muggle lives. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In which our heroes defend Crystal Lake, wage a Dream War, aim our missiles at a Godzilla and decide which movie monsters they could take in a fight. We look at the ideal ways to grapple with a gremlin, crush a cave creep, kill a Cujo, and get rid of a Grundlefly. Jackson defends his home against the notorious toilet ghoul, Zoe just straight up commits cold blooded murder, Zammit attempts to drown a car, and Duscher just wants to eliminate every monster from David Cronenberg’s filmography. It's a spooky rumble where we go toe to hideous clawed toe in a battle between horror movie alumni and some out of shape idiots.Want to help arm us against the creatures of the night? Head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month, you can help make a difference in the battle between good and evil. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In which our heroes don’t care that it’s bigger on the inside, aren’t impressed with how many parsecs you made the Kessel Run in and don’t want to deal with that mutant problem on Earth 616 because there are better fictional universes to live in. We look at the all powerful nature of dance magic, the problem of changing history, and wonder if it's better to be Tom Hanks or just live in the same universe as him. Jackson wins straight off the bat, Zammit accidentally learns two lessons, and Duscher just wants to own a shrimp company. It's a crisis on Infinite Earths as we attempt to insert ourselves into popular fiction with no regard for anyone else. Want to help the search for other worlds? Head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month, you can help make a difference in locating our other selves. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In which our heroes crash land on earth, get corporate, call themselves Clarke and act like a bunch of Kents while wondering why Superman find Lois Lane Attractive. We look at Kryptonian evolution, make an effort to get our heads around genetic attraction, attempt to rationalise forming an emotional emotional connection with an alien and struggle to imagine making love with a chimp.Jackson is obsessed with Superman’s butthole, Zammit is more interested in Superman’s penis and Duscher just wants to be the first astronaut to die of mustard gas poisoning. It’s an interspecies intergalactic interplanetary erotic journey as we do our best to answer the age old question of nature vs nurture.Want to help research the logic of Kryptonian buttholes? Head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month, you can help make a difference in locating the bastard. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In which our heroes plug ourselves back in to the Matrix, order a steak, bend all the restaurant’s cutlery and wonder why this computer simulation was programmed to have poverty. We look at the often mysterious and counter productive choices taken by our robot overlords, the final destination of the planets cows, and the potential eroticism of jackholes. Jackson wonders what the robots want with all our hair, Zammit proclaims he’d sell out Neo in a heartbeat to the surprise of absolutely no one and Duscher just wants to keep answering his own questions. It's a slow motion rooftop rumble where we answer the ringing pay phone, unplug, and find the red pill a little too hard to swallow.Want to help us feed the virtual poor? Head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month, you can help make a difference in virtual lives of starving children. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In which our heroes are orphaned on a desert planet, find a laser sword and boldly follow a strange old man on a misguided, ill-informed and incompetent journey into space. It's all things Obi-Wan as we look at his master plan of hiding Luke on Darth Vader’s home planet with Darth Vader’s last name with Darth Vader’s relatives in a house Darth Vader has definitely visited. Jackson proposes that Obi-Wan used up all his favours hiding Leia, Zammit questions how Hutts became the supreme rulers of the Outer Rim and Duscher just wants to know what Kit Fisto is up to these days. Join us in galaxy far, far away as we watch Obi-Wan give up and let Yoda deal with the consequences.Want to help Lord Vader get enough credits to find his missing kids? Head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month, you can help make a difference in the lonely dad’s life. Long live the Empire. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In which our heroes put on some green tights, shove a firefly into a jar and go off in search of a princess while wondering why Hyrule is so easy to conquer. We look at the often overlooked issue of segregation plaguing Hyrule, the problems with Zelda’s prophetic dreams and how much the kingdom gets dunked time and time again. Jackson proposes a unified government to fix the problem, Zammit has a strange urge to be on team Ganondorf and Duscher just wants to make Goron sounds. It’s a hack and slash through some murky dungeons without a compass, map or a boss key as we all uncover Link’s true purpose in helping Hyrule from Ganon. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In which our heroes drink on the job, hit on anyone and yell at everyone that we’re super secret spies while wondering why James Bond still has a job. Duscher claims he could be more successful as Jerry Steven: asexual and dressed for comfort, Jackson tries to stop him every step of the way as the Nefarious Dr Yang, the racial stereotype villain who wants to fuck the moon and Zammit is one half of the engineering duo, Q & R, tasked with fixing a chaffing problem. Jerry Steven, with his signature drink of stirred glass of water, fumbles his way through Dr Yang’s poorly designed base of operations and proves while he’s not the best secret agent, Dr Yang is an even worse villain. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In which our heroes wonder why anyone with a time machine would be in such a hurry and start to realise that Doc Brown may be an idiot. We look at his plans and notice that they’re never thought out, he’s constantly wrong about the time stream and goes to great lengths to ensure the McFlys benefit and the Tannens have a shit one. Jackson wants to know why Doc keeps bringing Jennifer on time adventures just to knock her out and put her in some trash, Zammit argues that Marty Jr going to jail might not be so bad and Duscher just wants to know what happened to the terrorists. It’s a dark climb as we uncover the secret shame of the Tannen family tree and wonder why people keep shitting in their cars. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In which our heroes look at Bruce Nolan’s life and wonder why God made him Almighty. We explore Bruce’s first act as good as he cause a municipal water problem, sexually harass a young woman and flat out steal from an upscale clothing store before committing anal based monkey assault on an hispanic youth leader. Twice. Jackson is horrified by the blatant abuse of power, Zammit has his own theory involving Morgan Freeman eating a God brain and Duscher just wants to punch a meteor and die a hero. It’s pure bafflement as we try to understand how God could let most of South East Asia be washed away and several star systems go super nova on the whim of a horny man. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In which our heroes see how deep Bruce Wayne’s daddy issues really go. We take a close look at Batman’s life through the lens of his parents as we try to see if they would be proud of their baby boy. Revolutionary medical braces are kept behind locked doors as Batman is revealed to be the king of loopholes. Zammit can’t comprehend how a parent could be impressed of their son for faking their own death, Jackson argues that Thomas Wayne would rather the Penguin as a protege and Duscher just wants to know where the bill for the bat credit card goes. Join us for bad Michael Cain impressions, Martha Wayne chiding Bruce for not being Superman and Thomas Wayne as the saddest Riddler you’ll ever see. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In which our heroes slip on a banana peel and blue shell themselves. It’s Mario’s reign of terror as we try to work out the logistics of organising a go-kart race with your nemesis, your girlfriend who keeps getting kidnapped under your watch, a living fungus and an actual, wild gorilla to name a few. Jackson looks at things from the perspective of a goomba, Duscher brings forth Mario’s clear agreement with Bowser to terrorise his friends every time they have a party and Zammit marvels at Mario’s diabolic genius of making his friends compete to join him on his next adventure. It’s a brightly coloured Mario themed Hunger Games as everyone spends far too much time doing terrible impressions of video game characters. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.