Rethinking Leadership

The bottom line for level 3 is that it has the person you’re talking with look in a place they haven’t looked before.

How often do You find yourself feeling guilty? Guilty because you felt bad about saying yes or because you feel bad about saying no. Guilty because you feel you’ve compromised your reputation of being the one who... (fill in the blank) What if you asked yourself, “For the sake of what?” Listen to Episode 19 on how guilt as a strategy has outlived it’s usefulness and how to find freedom from guilt moving forward.

In this episode, De and Jackie talk about world change and take the stance of "it is possible!" We each have a part to play. We each see the world from our unique perspective, we have unique passions and ideas, and we need every voice to be heard. What becomes possible when every person with a deep desire for creating a new world commits to small, bold, incremental moves towards that change?

Appreciative Inquiry (AI) is a methodology used to create positive change. When you are looking for ways to positively create impact, you will find AI to be a way of moving forward that is co-creative, generative and sustainable. In Episode 17, we share the five principles of AI and how most of the tools we’ve shared in previous episodes are embedded in this process. And the great news is that you will find this approach to be applicable in your organization, your business, your community or your family. Resources mentioned in this episode: 1. Appreciative Inquiry Principles: https://appreciativeinquiry.champlain.edu/learn/appreciative-inquiry-introduction/5-classic-principles-ai/ 2. Book: Sitting in the Fire, Large group transformation using conflict and diversity by Arnold Mindell: https://www.amazon.com/Sitting-Fire-Transformation-Conflict-Diversity/dp/1619710242 Worksheet, an Ai Exercise for You: http://jackielesser.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/04/Worksheet-Episode-17-Appreciative-Inquiry.pdf

16 Creative Resourceful and Whole by Serving fresh ideas over coffee

Listening Fully is an essential skill, and quite frankly, an act of love. Listening fully is being present and attentive, ensuring the other person is heard and correctly understood; it is placing the relationship as a higher priority than any individual's needs or agenda. Listen now as De and Jackie share important steps for listening fully.

Are you struggling with a person that feels hard to be with? Take a look at the story you tell yourself and break free from the patterns that keep the relationship in status quo. What are your assumptions about that other person? When was the last time you were genuinely curious about the other? Listen now to Cultivate the Key Coaching Competency of Curiosity to change those patterns, generate more freedom and gain peace of mind.

In this episode, we explore our part in creating or contributing to the reality in which we find ourselves. Consider the 'self-fulfilling prophecy:' We see others in a certain way (i.e.: negative, smart, unhelpful...) and then treat them accordingly. They, then, respond accordingly with behavior that aligns with the way they are being treated. They “live into” the person we see them as, the person we expect them to be!

Have you ever been in a situation where you’re feeling perfectly peaceful and something happens, someone says or does something that knocks you right out of your peaceful place and into pissed off or panicked? Listen now to Episode 12 for 4 tips for feeling peaceful regardless of the circumstance or situation.

Why does change feel so hard? In the last episode De & Jackie talked about what happens in our bodies and brains when we change feels threatening in any way. In this episode, De & Jackie share what is required to navigate change more easily and gracefully. Listen now to get the 3 B’s that will make all the difference.

Change can be difficult and the level of difficulty often has to do with our psychology as well as our physiology. Change actually triggers fight or flight responses in the brain’s chemistry. In this episode, De and Jackie discuss and normalize the change process and share a simple model derived by neuroscientist, Dr. David Rock, to help you understand how change feels to the brain.

We each have a normal human need to feel that we are valued, that we are making a contribution, that our ideas are listened to. When this healthy need begins to become unhealthy, or toxic to our relationships, is when I satisfy my ‘need to be right’ by making you wrong.

We receive many requests of us each day, whether from an employee, a co-worker, or a family member. What habits exist around how we respond to requests upon our time? When do we say yes when we mean no? Where are we succumbing to cultural pressures to give an immediate response to every text or email we receive? In this episode, De and Jackie share thoughts on responding to others in ways that are authentic, genuine, and honoring to the relationship. The 4th P is Permission…

7 I Don't Know What Anything Is For by Serving fresh ideas over coffee

There are so often times when we are triggered by something in our outer world and we think it’s the other person making us angry, when in fact, it’s really that we’re seeing a part of ourselves reflected by that person. And this part of ourselves represents something that we have a hard time being with (i.e.: judgment, criticism, victim-mentality, etc). Welcome to the phenomenon called projection! An important step on our journey is becoming aware of projection and how it works, so we can begin to notice our projections and do the work of owning them.

We all face overwhelm. Whether it's tackling something new or having too much to do in too little time, overwhelm comes in a variety of ways for a variety of reasons. When you are overwhelmed, your panic button is set off. And overwhelm effects your body, mind and spirit. In this episode, Jackie and De discuss the strategies to overcome overwhelm by rewiring your panic button on the physical, emotional, mental and spiritual levels. Get ready to feel peaceful rather than panicked!

Triggers. We’ve all got em. Sometimes we are triggered by what someone else says or does, and more often than not, we get triggered as a result of our own thoughts or behaviors. De and Jackie talk about being triggered and what is actually happening in our brains and in our bodies in those triggering moments. They share an alliteration to help us relieve the trigger and return to a responsive – as opposed to reactive – frame of mind.

In this episode we introduce the wisdom of how to begin everything. Just like any project you’ve ever started, you begin with the foresight to know where you want to end up. Listen in as we share stories and examples of why and how beginning with the end in mind will always keep you true to yourself and focused on what’s most important.

Today we’re getting personal! Listen into this rich conversation in which Jackie coaches De in making deep discoveries about: - Taking responsibility to be the meaning maker - Being of an observer of ourselves and noticing our own “stuff.” - Making conscious choices about how we will show up in our relationships. - Looking at ourselves through the lens of compassion and getting curious about our thoughts and behaviors, rather than judging them.

In this episode, Jackie and De talk about the practice and the gift of Self Compassion. Through compelling personal stories, they reveal the importance of being in compassionate and affirming relationship with oneself.